“It takes a little time sometimes

To get your feet back on the ground

It takes a little time sometimes

To get the Titanic turned back around

It takes a little time sometimes

But baby, you’re not going down

It takes more than you’ve got right now

Give it, give it time”

(from “Takes a Little Time” on Behind the Eyes, © Amy Grant, 1997)

Spiritual First Breaks Cycle

During a season in our “turning the Titanic around,” my son and I were locked in a cycle. He grew angry, and I grew angry for his anger. The Lord led me to a year or more focused time of daily repentance for bitterness. One of these “cycle” moments, Holy Spirit flashed a thought in me to stop – and release his sin. “Your sins are forgiven, and your debts are released,” I stated in a separate room. This is an actual empowerment Jesus gave as we walk with Him in His Spirit (John 20:23). Five minutes or less later he returned in perfect peace. I was stunned, as we had been locked in this cycle. That day, it turned as I had been repenting for me first for bitterness, and then applied the release of sin to him.

Yes, it is His Will

Know that it is Father’s kind intention and good will for your children and grandchildren (no matter their age) to walk with Him in wholeness and fullness.

I’ve heard from parents a recurring theme over the sorrow of their grown children’s choices, and the parents’ helplessness as they watch their children and pray for Father to change their children.

Again, Father designed you to be upstream of your children and grandchildren. While you cannot force your will on them, and while you may feel helpless after many prayers with few results, please hear this.

What you change with Father in you first, at your prayer altar in repentance and holy exchange of life with the Lord Jesus Christ, does affect your children and grandchildren. Furthermore, when you ask Father to apply it to them, too (then seal and rearguard it), that amplifies the impact. (Don’t forget to include your spouse.)

What Spiritual FIRST Looks Like

Here are several key spiritual first practical steps. This is not a list to follow religiously. We are so ingrained to make a physical step first and continue on in that pattern that it’s helpful to get a glimpse of what it looks like to take action spiritually first.

Know it is Father’s will for you and your family to be continuously more like His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ (Romans 8:29). He has paid for you all to have this. You don’t have to beg or plead. You can stand in faith and confidence. This is like “free money,” if you will, because Father gives His YES from Heaven and you give your AMEN on earth (2 Corinthians 1:20). Yes, this alone (a one-time AMEN on your part) does oversimplify some prayers and asking forgiveness processes we have to walk through, but He is completely FOR your walking in this way.

Make a daily habit of going to your prayer altar, and repenting for sins known and unknown against God and man, and every word you should not have said. I recommend including bitterness, fear, pride, perversion, and idolatry. Holy Spirit will shine His light on anything else that needs to be addressed, or addressed in more detail.

Come expectantly, He says boldly, to His throne of grace to receive for yourself (and your family, Hebrews 4:16). It transformed my life when I began asking daily for His grace before arising.

Allow Father’s processes in you to cause you to live in new patterns in His Spirit. This takes more than one prayer. Its effect, however, will be felt by all around you, and even causes downstream ripples in your family.

Should you have a blow up – or should a conversation reveal a place where you caused injury – humbly ask their forgiveness. As we own our failures and ask their forgiveness, it produces seismic shifts in hearts and, therefore, relationships.

Watch for times of need and/or vulnerability. That is the most opportune time to show mercy and grace. Please note that there is a great distinction between enabling abuse because a person is “showing a different face” to illicit a certain merciful response from you. That’s not what I’m referring to. For instance, God forbid a family member should experience sickness or trouble or a need – or even a “crash” in their life from sinful choices which makes them wake up. But, if they do, that’s an opportune time to drop what you’re doing and to show up in meaningful ways with love, care, support, and attentiveness. This is your love-mercy-grace in spiritual action in times of physical vulnerability or need. Father does not cause sickness that Jesus paid to redeem us from. However, He does Romans 8:28 it by making it work for good, should it occur. It is actually Father’s model to show mercy in times of vulnerability: “. . .because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved” (NIV, Ephesians 2:4). “But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us” (KJV, Romans 5:8).

Pray for them. Speak blessing to them in your prayer time. Ask the Father if there’s a physical gift you could give that would minister to them, then pray over the gift and pray that they would be prepared to receive and respond.

Practical Ways to Get Scripture

into Your Grandchildren

Pray over an audio Bible which you purchase. Pray for your children to receive and respond to it, and incorporate it for your grandchildren, if possible.

Should your grandchildren still be young enough to visit and play, turn on Scripture as you engage in activities such as art, building blocks, play dough, whatever healthy activity that’s age-appropriate. Even if you’re on a tight budget, YouTube has many audio versions of Scripture available for free. Further, there are Bible apps. Biblegateway.com, an amazing free searchable Scripture site, provided an audio Scripture app which you can download. Or, you could read a chapter to your grandchildren. Whatever way you can find to get Scripture in to your grandchildren sows life to them now and for their future.

“So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it” (KJV, Isaiah 55:11).

Coloring or painting Scripture is a fun way to incorporate Scripture, as age-appropriate. Speaking a verse together and talking about it is another great way to make it memorable. When listening, it’s easy to get large portions of Scripture moving through; that’s the wide angle view. Reflecting on a much smaller portion, such as one verse or a small group of verses, causes it to go deep.

Finally, if your grandchildren are grown and you realize you’ve missed key moments, I pray Father’s great blessing and grace to you and yours. We have all missed key moments and are amazed at what we did not know – and where we failed in parenting. Heavenly Father alone is the Perfect Parent. He’s also the One who stands outside time and beckons us to “redeem time” in Him (Ephesians 5:15-17). Recognize these spiritual steps first apply to your grandchildren as well. Ask your Heavenly Father to lead you in redeeming the time with Him (which often, if not always, starts with repentance. Repentance is both recognizing our sins and confessing them as well as changing our mind-sets from earth ways to Father’s ways). Ask your Heavenly Father to give all your children and grandchildren a heart to know Him and His Spirit and Scripture.

You have a mighty role to play in your children and grandchildren’s lives. Heavenly Father’s good will and kind intention placed you upstream. Every day is a new moment in Him to begin again.

“Who has done this and carried it through, calling forth the generations from the beginning? I, the Lord—with the first of them and with the last—I am he.” (NIV, Isaiah 41:4)

The End

written by Crystal Wade, © 2025

image created by AI